Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
i actually just woke up with a lampshade on my head. god damn cliches.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Randomize
