Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
I used a bag of wine as a pillow last night.
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
Randomize
