Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
Randomize