dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
you went over to those random dudes and told them you were an ordained minister and would like to bless their food. they laughed and agreed, then you said "now bow your heads in prayer" as soon as they did you grabbed a taco off their tray and bolted out the door.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
Randomize
