lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
Came home and the girl was sitting on the steps "talking" on her ipod touch AND was halfway done eating a raw cucumber.
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
I'm such a good drunk match marker. You single, you single... Drunk friend meet single boy. BOOM illegitimate baby made!
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
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