I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
Just pulled back my covers. Jizz. Jizz everywhere. Hipster jizz everywhere on my only set of sheets.
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
just found out that she named her cat after me.
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
Randomize
