We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
She just locked herself in the bedroom with an unopened bottle of wine and a steak knife. Unfortunately for her fingers, I stopped giving a fuck two hours ago.
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
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