Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
I gave the guy a $20 tip on a $9 cab ride, he thought I was just bad at math but I was really just incredibly thankful to be alive and home.
I was like "don't worry, I'm a math major and you deserve the shit out of that 222% tip"
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
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