question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
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