3:12 am: but i thought i was coming over tonight, don't fall asleep i wore new underwear
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
I've had more sex since the twins moved in than I'd had in the previous four years. They are the best wingman ever.
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Randomize
