we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
Side note: I apologize for sex being the subject of every single one of my texts. That's what happens when you date an older man who constantly denies you sex on the basis of his ridiculous morals.
Randomize
