You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
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