i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.
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