i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
Shout out to my liver for being the true MVP. It easily put in more work than LeBron or Curry this week.
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
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