Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I sent out a mass text that said "margaritas for Jesus?" and nobody responded, worst Easter ever.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
Dental hygienist just pulled two flakes of glitter out. And asked me how i've been doing with the divorce.
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
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