hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
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