you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
Randomize