You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
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It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
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She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
I had tater tots and weed with a stripper at 4am who compared the size of my boob to her head because fuck you my life rocks
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life