I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
I just realized I had sex more when i looked like a fat elton john. Fuck my life.
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
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