I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
At this point, I would light birthday candles in my vagina for free drinks
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
Randomize
