Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
