making cat noises will not fix the situation.
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
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