R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
home. puking in laundry basket.
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
Randomize
