I hope mine doesn't look like that
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
