I hate your face
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
So bottomless mimosas = me waking up in a truck bed in a random neighborhood with no purse or phone or idea how I got there.
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
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