Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
I just realized that my mother and I have the same favorite sex position, Guess which one!
OMG! Ew.
Lucky Dad.
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize