Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
just accidentally masturbated with tiger balm. best. accident. ever.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
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