So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
Randomize
