Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
I'm too drunk to be surrounded by this many indians
How do you manage to be drunk and a racial minority so often?
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
Randomize
