I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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