This girl is more easily done than said...
I dont know whether to be proud of myself for not driving, or being proud that i was so messed up I couldnt drive
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
Turns out that my surprise "happy birthday" drop-in for my dad turned into a "my parents like afternoon sex a lot" realization.
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
Randomize
