you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
He made a toga out of my hot pink bed sheets and cracked an egg on his head. Then he proceeded to alphabetize our DVD collection, which was impressive because I'm 99% sure he couldn't have done that sober.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
Randomize
