where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
I hate you so much right now. You got us kicked out of my favorite bar because your drunk ass was hogging the Bluetooth jukebox and would play NOTHING but that goddamn skeleton song. IT'S NOT EVEN OCTOBER YET.
Spopky scrzy skeletonssz
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
Randomize
