It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
he's gonorrhea incarnate
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
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