I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
