oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
Randomize
