Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize
