I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
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