thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
Randomize
