Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
Priorities: waking up on your doorstep desperately clutching half a meatball marinara but with no sign of your keys, purse or housemate. Where are you?!
When you give the bridesmaid toast someday at my wedding I need you to quote Ricky Bobby in some form. And slip in your sister has the vagina of awesomeness. That is all.
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
Dude he downed 9 shots of tequila, sang bohemian rhapsody with 3 randoms Wayne's world style, solo'd closing time, chased the hot bartender's dog all the way to main, tackled him, carried him back, hot bar tender hugged AND kissed him, then he does a jumping heel click and leaps into my car through the window. Next rounds free at the yeti. Needless to say your little brother is a tequila god.
Basically.
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
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