Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
Can you pick me up a bottle of make-an-ass-of-myself tonight?
Do you want cuervo gold or silver?
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
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