Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
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