seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
She made me put my jeans under her mattress so that I wouldn't leave in the morning while she was still sleeping. Apparently I just look like "that guy".
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
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