Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
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