I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
I've blown a few things in my day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
Just had a talk about safe sex with my mom. Not about protection. About the very real possibility of a "penile fracture". Gotta love having a nurse for a mother.
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
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