My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
You told her you double majored in Geology and Telekinesis. When has that line ever worked for you?
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Randomize
