new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
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