i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
Randomize
