I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
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