You work out of a Hotel?
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
Randomize
