is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
Randomize
